The Story Of Mr Rumplebottom.

 

In the beginning, there was once a man named Mr Rumplebottom, he was quite a round fellow, and a rich one at that, but he was a very generous man, he liked to read to starving kids and homeless people, and liked to give canned food to kids with cancer. He was a rather generous man, and he liked to post his efforts on social media for the world to see, however one feature of his round plump body stuck out, his huge rump. He used to take pride in it, until the masses kept belittling him over it. Whenever he would post his most recent endeavor, the masses would poke fun at Rumplebottoms mysterious “posterior”. The masses posted about it on social media. Whenever Mr Rumplebottom would go trophy hunting, his hunting mates would make rather indecent remarks about his rump. One day, Mr Rumplebottom would snap and enough was enough. He posted a social media telegram containing a motion picture of him reading a book to a malnourished child. Everyone, even mr Rumplebottoms most appreciative colleagues, kept making fun of him for his massive rump. Mr Rumplebottom began to feel unappreciated, and decided that his efforts didn't matter anymore. He decided to stop going outside, and helping the needy. Rumplebottom felt awful, and wanted to hide away from the masses. On a late stormy afternoon, Mr Rumplebottom shut his door for the final time, a ear piercing, grand slam the masses could hear travel around the town. As the days passed, Mr Rumplebottom went into an even bigger slumber, he could not trophy hunt with his fabled elephant musket, and could not do what he did most, give his philanthropy to the masses. He sat with his steak dinner and mashed potatoes and caviar, crying. Mr Rumplebottom would stay home and do nothing but read his fabled literature. Such great classics as “The Old Duke” and “The Mabled Mistress”. Classics that got Rumplebottom through such a hard time. However one day, one of the malnourished kids decided to risk something, a knock on Mr Rumplebottoms grand oakwood door. This was enough to send the town into a frenzy, and alas, while Mr Rumplebottom was reading his literature, he heard a faint knock on the door. The malnourished adolescent was not tall enough to knock on the cast iron door knocker, molded into the shape of an intimidating lion, able to deter any creature with a noble soul. Mr Rumplebottom decided to answer the door, telling whichever mortal who rang it to shoo before he released the hounds. However, when the door opened, Mr Rumplebottom was greeted by a strange sight, a malnourished child. The malnourished child then said, “Mr Rumplebottom, I really just want to tell you what you've done for me has been rather exquisite.” Mr Rumplebottom then said, “I yield my elephant gun if you shall dare to mock my rather plump bottom.” The boy then said, “No mr Rumplebottom, I appreciate what you have done for me, it has been rather exquisite, you do what no other rich man wants to do, I do not care you have a rather round juicy bottom.” Mr Rumplebottom was flattered, the clouds suddenly cleared to a beautiful blue sky, the birds chirped, and Mr Rumplebottom thought for a moment. “You know, I don't need validation from these peasants, what matters is that the people I've helped appreciate what i've done, and that's why I do what I do.” The masses watching from the windows began to feel great shame in themselves, but then something rather revolutionary occurred within the hour, Mr Rumplebottom finally took his first afternoon stroll in days. The boy tagged along, and the masses still poked fun at mr rumplebottom for his massive rump, but he knew that they cant be helped, and he can help whom those he can.